Do Cheaters Miss Their Ex? 20 Things You Should Know
Anger, depression, unexplainable pains, shattered esteem, and resentful feelings are what bespeak the feelings of one who has been cheated on by his/her Partner.
Whether a cheater misses their ex depends on various factors, including the circumstances of the breakup, the reasons for cheating, and the individual’s emotional makeup.
In some cases, a cheater may miss their ex, particularly if they had a deep emotional connection or if the relationship provided a sense of security or comfort. However, this longing might not necessarily indicate genuine remorse for their actions. Instead, it could stem from feelings of loneliness, nostalgia, or regret for the loss of the relationship.
On the other hand, some cheaters may not miss their ex at all, especially if they cheated for reasons unrelated to their emotional attachment to their partner. For example, if the cheating was driven by a desire for excitement or novelty, the cheater may not feel any remorse or longing for the past relationship.
Ultimately, each person’s experience and feelings are unique, so there’s no one-size-fits-all answer to whether cheaters miss their ex.
Amidst the forest fire of fury and all the negative feelings that characterize being cheated on, victims of this selfish act can’t help but ask do cheaters miss their ex?
Cheating is an act that everyone can relate to, though some are more grievous than others.
One can be cheated in a game, by a friend, or a business partner and in this context be cheated on by his/her partner.
Regardless of how one was cheated, the feelings remain the same. You feel angry and disappointed with the perpetrator.
When it comes to relationships, a cheating partner leaves the victim to ponder on not just this question; do cheaters miss their ex? but with several other questions like;
● Am I not good enough for him/her?
● Is my love worthless to him/her?
● Where did I get it all wrong?
● Did I not love him/her enough?
● What does his cheating partner possess that I do not have?
We may not provide all the answers to the above questions in this article. However, our focus in this article is to answer this question: do cheaters miss their ex?
Thus, if this is one of the questions bothering your heart, then read on as we unravel the answers to this question: do cheaters miss their ex?
Experience 1: Do Cheaters Miss Their Ex?
The above question was asked by Micheal who broke up with his girlfriend of 5 years because he caught her in bed with another man.
His girlfriend Chloe is a serial cheater. She has cheated on him countlessly. However, her last infidelity became the straw that broke the camel’s back.
Micheal couldn’t stomach the fact that he has to keep forgiving her for her sexual affairs with other men. In times past, he thought he was not doing enough for her. Therefore, he went out of his way to please her. He spoiled her with love and attention, yet that couldn’t deter her from cheating on him.
Micheal has had enough of the emotional torture, he felt he was being used by his girlfriend to fill in time. Therefore, he had to let go of her, and when lonely he would ask; do serial cheaters feel remorse?
Experience 2: Do Cheaters Miss Their Ex?
Mrs. Rose also asked the above question, when she found out that her husband cheated on her with her best friend Mary.
They’ve been Married for 3 years, and in all these years of being married to Mr. John, his husband, he has always kept his commitment to her and their marriage.
More so, her best friend Mary has always admired her husband and constantly sought an opportunity to seduce him.
An opportunity presented itself when Mrs. Rose traveled for her company’s Retreat and left her husband lonely for two weeks.
Her best friend always came over to the house to keep the husband company and she ended up seducing him.
Mr. John couldn’t resist the temptation before him, having been deprived of Sex for several days.
He had a one-night stand with her and that single act spelled woes for his marriage.
His wife found out the truth after several months had gone by. Her best friend was always calling and chatting with her husband.
On several occasions, she caught her husband chatting very late in the night and he would always hide to make some calls.
She knew something was wrong and she was bent on discovering what had gone wrong.
On a fateful day, she got her hands on her husband’s phone, while the husband was having his shower. She went through all the texts and chats he had with her best friend and she was shocked by the truth she discovered.
She confronted the husband with what she found out and her husband couldn’t deny not sleeping with her best friend.
However, he felt deeply sorry for his adulterous act and asked his wife for forgiveness.
On the other hand, his wife was overwhelmed emotionally and just couldn’t deal with the bitter truth that confronted her. She filed for a divorce and they got divorced a year later.
I cheated and I miss her have always been the words on her ex-husband’s lips after their divorce because he still loves her and was always seeking ways to work things out with her.
Likewise, his ex-wife can’t help but say, I miss my cheating ex-husband, whenever loneliness overwhelms her.
She has always wondered why she still thinks about him despite the hurt and pains he made her go through.
The above two scenarios depict that two main characters cheat in relationships. One is a serial cheater and the other mistakenly cheated on his partner.
Therefore, for a cheater to miss his/her ex depends on his/her personality or what led to the act.
On that note, an ex who cheated on you is missing you, when he/she exhibits the following ;
● He/she feels sorry for his actions and also shows that he/she is sorry by apologizing in person or by asking those close to you to help apologize on his/her behalf.
● He/she remembers your special days or the beautiful moments you both had in the past. This might be your birthday, wedding anniversary, or a promise you both made to each other.
● You see him/her in places that you visit often.
● He/she refuses to start a romantic relationship with someone else.
● He/she does not admit to himself and others that it is over between the two of you.
Related Post: What To Say To A Cheating Partner
When Do Cheaters Realize That They Made A Mistake
Humans are fallible by nature. We all make mistakes that we often come to realize earlier or later in life. However, not everyone sees cheating as a mistake, it is a deliberate act by a lot of people in a romantic relationship.
Yeah, a serial cheater cheats on his/her partner for the fun of it. He/she is always so busy with his/her sexcapades that he/ she barely ponders on his/her actions to retrace his/her steps. A serial cheater only feels sorry when he/she is caught and quickly moves on to the next person that appeals to his sexual fantasies
On the contrary, one who is committed to a long-term relationship with his/her partner is likely to realize his mistake, when he/she cheats on his/her spouse with someone else.
More so, some cheaters realize their mistake before breaking up with their spouse, and others will realize their mistakes when their relationship with their spouse comes to an end and it dawns on them that they’ve made a terrible mistake.
So, when do cheaters realize that they made a mistake? A cheating partner has realized his/her mistakes when;
1. He/she often talks about you:
A cheating partner has realized his/her mistakes when he/she often talks about you, especially when he/she is with his/her family, friends, or even his/her new lover.
He/she finds pleasure in talking about the lovely memories you both had and would also wish to make new memories with you.
2. He/she realizes that no one else can feel the void your absence created:
A cheating partner may start a new relationship with someone else, but there is a void that only you can fill. He/she realizes his/her mistake when his/her new partner doesn’t care about him/her the way you do nor satisfy his sexual fantasies.
The void in his/ her heart keeps calling for you that he/she feels so guilty and ashamed of his ill actions towards you.
3. Acknowledging his/her mistakes precedes all his/her actions:
Apologizing for a wrong committed against a partner is often difficult for a lot of people in a relationship. The majority would rather hold on to their ego than apologize to their partner.
However, when your partner cheats on you and still surrenders his/ her ego by admitting his/her mistakes and by also taking actions to make things right, then his/her mistakes have become obvious to him/her.
4. He/She Shows Readiness to Please you no matter what it takes:
A cheater has realized his/her mistakes when he/she is ready to go the extra mile to build the trust he/she broke.
He/she yields to the demands of his/her partner without any form of argument. This might be seeking professional help, renewing his/her vows to the spouse, ending his/her relationship with his/her accomplice, etc.
Furthermore, his/her words are usually backed up with actions that truly show that he/she has realized his/her mistakes and is truly sorry for the consequences on his/her partner.
5. He/She cut ties with the person he/she cheated on you with:
A cheater who has realized his/her mistakes despises whatever reminds him/her of his/her accomplice. A good example is when he/she deletes the cheating partner’s contacts, his/her pictures, emails, or chats.
Related Post: Sample Messages To Send To An Ex Who Hurt You
How To Punish A Cheating Boyfriend Emotionally
You keep having unimaginable thoughts about the one who broke your trust by cheating on you with someone else.
You feel so much anger and hatred for him. Sometimes, you wish you could tear him limb from limb or even carry out a revenge mission by sleeping with someone else too.
Being a victim of cheating is a traumatic experience for a lot of people. Some people become emotionally wrecked, their self-esteem, and peace of mind.
Others become suicidal, from their inability to handle the pains they feel.
They also become so embittered that a lot of destructive thoughts cloud their sense of reasoning. These thoughts might be the thoughts of killing or harming the person that made a mess of their emotions.
Nevertheless, there is no amount of harm or ill feelings towards your boyfriend that will help alleviate the pain that you feel.
Instead, there are better ways to get back at him without allowing your emotions to get the best of you. All you have to do is to take a deep breath and follow these steps on how to punish a cheating boyfriend emotionally.
● Accept the truth:
He cheated on you with someone else and that’s the fact. You have to accept this truth and not deny it.
Yeah, the truth hurts and it’s ripping your heart apart. It will make you cry, lose your appetite, stay awake all night or even fall sick.
Experiencing all these is not strange, they are expected because you are a human with emotions. However, do not dwell on your pains for too long. Wipe your tears, pick up the broken pieces of your heart and get to know from him the reason for cheating on you.
His explanations and brokenness will determine if you will give him a second chance (that’s if he unintentionally cheated on you) or end the relationship with him(if he intentionally cheated).
Whatever might be his reason for cheating, do not throw yourself at him or be so desperate to get his attention. Give yourself time to think through all that has happened and make your decisions.
● Keep your head up:
There is no denying the fact that it’s been an emotionally draining experience for you. Nonetheless, you do not have to look like what you’ve been through, you don’t have to look so miserable and pitiable.
Keep your head up, act as if nothing happened(this might be difficult, but just do it anyway), wear a warm smile whenever you meet people(Especially the male folk), wear nice clothes, and exude confidence.
After all, your heart was broken and not your life. By doing this, your boyfriend will be tortured emotionally by your indifference.
● Channel the love you have for him to something else:
Your love life may have stalled momentarily, but there are other things to live for. This could be something you’re passionate about, a pet project, your job, studies, etc.
Channel the love you have for him to those things that you enjoy doing, this will make you think less about him and will also make him feel less of himself.
Yeah, a man’s ego receives a boost, when he’s the center of attention and is deflated when he’s denied attention and respect.
● Erase whatever reminds you of him:
This might be his contact, his pictures, the gifts and flowers he got for you.
You can also decide to block him on social media or you can write about your journey on social media and allow him to see them. Reading about your journey or seeing your happy pictures on social media will make him feel guilty for breaking your trust.
● Awaken your social life:
The pain you feel should not prevent you from meeting new people. Attend seminars, conferences, or networking events that will allow you to meet people that will love and respect you for who you are.
More so, to punish him emotionally, you should go close to his circle of friends. Make friends with his close friends, and tell them all that he did to you. This is not to attract pity but to make your boyfriend feel guilty.
Also, do not be quick to jump into a romantic relationship, give yourself time to heal.
● Focus on what lies ahead:
Being cheated on is not the end of the world. He may not have valued your trust nor recognized your worth, but there is someone out there who will love and show true commitment to you.
Therefore, end the relationship with him(if that is what you truly want) and be optimistic that you will meet the one who will value your love.
Get so busy with your growth and personal development. Yeah, your dedication to your growth should make him keep wondering what you are up to.
Related Post: Clear Signs You’re Begging For Love
How To Handle A Lying And Cheating Boyfriend/Girlfriend
When asked what we want in a partner. A good number of people will respond thus; I will love an honest, caring, and a God-Fearing partner.
This goes to show that, no one wants to be with someone who is not honest or who makes light of his/her commitment to his/her partner.
Nevertheless, what happens when one ends up with a liar and a cheating partner, do you end the relationship? Or learn how to live with him/her?
Yeah, lying and cheating go hand in hand in relationships. One who cheats on his partner with someone else will always tell lies to cover up his secret affairs.
Handling a lying and cheating boyfriend/girlfriend is difficult for a lot of people. However, we have provided some of the steps you can follow to make it easier for you.
On that note, here is how to handle lying and a cheating boyfriend/girlfriend
1. Get Enough Proof of his Sexual Escapades:
A cheater is likely to deny that he/she cheated on his/her partner when confronted. Therefore, it is safer to get enough evidence before confronting him/her. It can be a voice record, pictures, or screenshots of his/her chats with his/her accomplice.
When confronted with enough proof, it will be difficult for him/her to deny that he/she cheated on you. While you may suspect that he/she is cheating on you through his secret calls or body language, it is better to act like you’re not aware of his/her strange behaviors till you’re able to get solid evidence against him or her. You wouldn’t only take him/her by surprise, but you will also break down his wall of defense and excuses.
2. Make him understand the impact of his/her action:
He/she may not understand the impact of his/her action on you. Therefore, do not leave any stone unturned when pouring out your heart to him/her, tell your partner how you feel and how his actions will affect your relationship with him or her going forward.
Let your partner know how much you love him/her and how this love for him/her will no longer be the same.
3. Give him the Silent Treatment :
A cheater is prone to play the victim whenever he/she is caught. He/she will do everything to get your attention. While your partner may be seeking your attention after being caught, you have to give him/her cold shoulders.
● Ignore his calls, texts and also avoid seeing him. Give yourself time to think about the best decision to take, before communicating with him/ her again.
However, you must bear in mind that it is very difficult for a cheater and a liar to change his/her bad ways, there is a probability that he/she might repeat the same act in the future. Thus, you must put all these into consideration before you decide on whether to continue the relationship with him/her or bid him/her goodbye.
4. Do not be too hard on yourself:
You don’t have to feel guilty or blame yourself for your partner’s unfaithful act. It wasn’t any fault of yours and even if it was, it’s not enough reason for him/her to break your trust.
Related Post: Clear Indications Your Ex Wants You To Come Back
Final Thought.
The pain of being cheated on may be devastating, but do not let these pains overwhelm you at the expense of your mental and emotional health.
One thing is certain, people will love you as much as you love yourself, and people will value you as much as you value yourself.
Therefore, do not neglect ‘you’ even as you heal from the pains that come with being cheated on by someone else.